Team Building
by malcolm lake
Summary: The Dunder Mifflin Crew play paintball. Set after Safety Training.


_Not my characters. Just some random ideas on what might happen next on the show. If you have some thoughts on this, please review_ - ml. 

Michael Scott, with thinly veiled hostility, allowed Toby to sit in on his call with Jan.

Jan's voice came through over the line, "After the merging of the Stamford and Scranton Branches, profits are up over the last quarter, so Corporate is pleased. However, we have had three resignations of sales staff, one employee fired and subsequently rehired, one employee forced to take anger management and a warehouse employee attacked a coworker and was fired. Also, based on Toby's report we had a situation where an employee was on the roof last week and threatened to jump."

Michael glared at Toby before answering. "That was a…That was a safety…It…

Jan interrupted, "Michael, it doesn't matter. There appears to be a huge morale problem in Scranton and we need to do something about it. Now I've sent some brochures to Toby…"

Toby pulled out the papers and handed them over to Michael. "I've been looking at them," the HR person said. "There are some courses on improving communication…"

Michael flipped through the brochures with disinterest.

Toby continued, "There's also one on conflict resolution…"

Michael's eye was caught by something. "Paintball!"

Jan's disgust was obvious in her voice, "Michael, this is a serious effort to improve morale, not play time."

Michael Scott, however, had firmly latched onto the idea, "It says here that a paintball encourages team building, awards initiative, and diffuses aggression."

Toby tried another tact. "Michael, we may want to focus on activities that don't involve employees firing projectiles at each other. Maybe a training…"

"Paintball!" Michael shouted. "Paintball!"

The camera focused on Toby, who bowed his head and shook it slowly from side to side.

"We'll offer prizes, it'll be great," Michael enthused.

Jan said, "We'll do this your way, Michael. But it's important that we get some positive results."

Michael mouthed silently blah, blah, blah.

--------------

Michael, with a bounce to his step, hopped over to Pam's desk, "Pamana Canal."

Pam sighed and looked away.

Unabashed, Michael continued in a loud voice. "I have an announcement! We are having a mandatory team building exercise this weekend."

Everyone in the office turned to Michael.

"We're playing paintball!"

At that moment, every single person in the office imagined Michael being pelted with red paint cartridges. Except for Angela. In her imagination, the paint was green.

--------------

Jim interviewed for the camera. "So, Michael has decided that the problems in our office can be fixed by paintball." The camera zoomed over his shoulder to show Dwight shunning Drew (the employee formerly known as Andy). "It's a bold plan."

The camera moved back to a close up of Jim, who was smiling. "In the Stamford office, they were really into playing 'Call of Duty.' Karen…" The camera cuts to show Karen staring at Pam. "Karen was, without a doubt, the office champ. So if we could team up, there would be no stopping us. I know she'd have strategies, there would be planning sessions…" Jim's smile faded. He got up and walked back towards his desk, passing Michael. He didn't say anything as he settled back into his chair.

--------------

Michael interviewed. "We'll be splitting into two teams for the first phase of the training. To encourage participation, the winning team will receive fifty dollar gift cards to Staples. In the second phase, those who survive the first round will be involved in a winner-take-all tournament and the winner will get a two hundred dollar gift card. It will be much like the paper business, survival of the fittest."

--------------

Kelly and Ryan were in their office at the annex, now renamed "the love grotto," by Kevin.

"So Ryan, if one of us wins, we SO need to go to the Bahamas…"

Ryan's eyes widened. It's obvious he wanted to flee.

--------------

Drew interviewed. "I knew that coming back to the Scranton office would be a challenge. This paintball thing, just one more challenge to overcome."

--------------

The accounting group had their own opinions about the upcoming exercise. "I don't approve," Angela said to Oscar and Kevin. "It glorifies violence."

"Yeah," Kevin replied with a small grin.

--------------

Kevin interviewed. "I am really looking forward to shooting someone this weekend." The camera went over his shoulder and focused on Angela, who was talking to Oscar.

--------------

Saturday morning, the group met at Acme's Paintball, Arcade, and Mini-golf. Jim and Karen arrived first, casually dressed in jeans and sweatshirts. Karen seemed to be bouncing with anticipation. Pam rode out with Phyllis. Dwight was decked out in full camouflage gear and face paint. He had his own paintball gun.

Michael waited until everyone was there, even Creed. The manager shook his head at the older man's Birkenstocks and old peace symbol T-shirt. He wasn't sure Creed really knew what was happening, but that was how Creed was normally.

"Okay, people," Michael shouted. "Everyone… Okay. Well, we're going to split into two teams. I will, of course, be captain of one team, and…uh,…Toby will be the captain of the other. I've taken the liberty of randomly assigning people to each team. Team one will be me, Jim, Dwight, Ryan, Oscar, Meredith, and Andy."

"Drew," Andy corrected gently.

"Whatever," Michael replied. "Team 2 will be Toby, Creed, Stanley, Kevin, Karen, Pam, Angela, and Phyllis

"These teams are totally unfair," Pam said.

"I agree," Stanley replied. Everyone stared at Michael.

"You guys have more players," Michael pointed out. The staring continued. "Uhm, Okay. Well then let's put Andy, I mean Drew, on Toby's team and we'll take Angela." Dwight couldn't hide his smile.

--------------

A brief training session took place during which each office worker was shown how to use their weapons. Dwight showed Angela how to use her gun.

Karen had some trouble with the firing mechanism. As Jim tried to help, Dwight walked over, "No Jim," he said exasperated. There's a safety catch. Let me."

Dwight released the catch and handed it to Karen, who thanked him.

"So," the brunette asked, "What's the effective range of this?"

"Thirty feet, maybe forty for your gun," Dwight replied. "If you find someone within 10 to 15 feet within your sights, it is customary to ask if they want to surrender to avoid the potential to inflict bodily injury. I, of course, never surrender."

"Of course," Karen replied. Jim observed their interaction and raised his eyebrows towards the camera.

--------------

The setup for the camera crew was difficult. In the end they decided to spring for an additional two cameramen for the outing. The first game played was "Capture the Flag." One cameraman would set up at each flag, while a third was on a crane that allowed the third cameraman to scan the three-acre field.

The field itself had trees, concrete pipes, trenches, and irregular terrain to provide hiding places. Officials were spaced throughout the field to confirm "kills" and ensure that safety protocols were followed.

--------------

Everyone had dressed in the supplied coveralls and face shield, their faces just identifiable. Michael, who had yet to put on his face shield, addressed his team. "Okay, now I don't want you to act like girls out there." The camera moved to Angela and Meredith, who glared at Michael. "Jimbo, I want you, Oscar, and Ryan to attack with Angela and Meredith. I'll…I'll take the dangerous job and guard the flag."

"What about me?" Dwight asked, flexing his muscles.

"I have a special assignment for you," Michael said. He drew the salesman aside and whispered, "I want you to get Andy."

Dwight's face broke into a grinch-like smile.

--------------

Dwight is interviewed prior to the game. "This is why Michael is a great manager. He is able to identify the biggest threat, Andy. And it is my sworn duty to destroy that threat." He indicated his paintball gun. "This is the Jackson Pollock 3000. It is the most powerful paintball gun in existence. Its projectiles are fired at 305 feet per second. I have extensively trained with this weapon."

--------------

One official, a pretty blonde coed, was stationed beside Team 1's flag. Michael looked over to her and smiled. "Wow, you look like a model," he said.

"Please put on your face shield," she sighed. "We're about to start."

--------------

Toby assembled his team. "Okay guys, I know this isn't how you want to spend your weekends, but we should make the best of it. Be careful as you're going through the field and let's be safe."

Karen looked at the perpetually sad HR guy. "Hey, why don't you team up with me?"

"Really?" Toby asked.

"Yeah." Karen nodded. "I want to win and I think you can help me. Andy, I mean Drew, do you want to guard the flag with Creed and Stanley?"

"That sounds like a great idea," Drew replied. "And thank you for using my new name."

Karen continued, "Maybe the rest of you guys can go down the north side (pointing to her left) while Toby and I head down the south (pointing right) side. You could get behind some of those pipes and try to draw their fire."

"Sure," Pam replied.

--------------

Pam interviewed before the game. "Karen seems really into this. She took charge, which was great. It's just not what I expected from someone who was involved with… I mean she hadn't played paintball before."

--------------

The horn blared and the game started. Kelly was talking to Pam and Phyllis. "It's cool that Ryan and I are on different teams. That like, totally increases the odds that one of us will win."

Pam didn't quite follow the logic, but did the polite thing and refrained from interrupting.

"I think we should spread out a little," Phyllis suggested.

--------------

Dwight ran off towards the south side of the course. Ryan decided that it might be good to follow him.

--------------

Jim interviewed after the game. "Heading away from Dwight, pretty much a survival mechanism. He's a friendly fire incident waiting to happen."

--------------

Jim walked to the north side to make sure Dwight didn't shoot him "by mistake." Oscar had a similar thought. Angela and Meredith walked a short distance to the nearest concrete pipe.

Meredith pulled out a flask. "Want some?" she asked, knowing Angela would refuse.

--------------

Karen and Toby skirted the southern edge of the field. "We don't have a lot of places to hide," Toby noted.

"But we can only be attacked from the north or in front of us, so it's easier to see them coming. And they won't be expecting us here." Karen explained.

They had only been walking a few minutes when they heard someone approaching from in front of them.

Karen pulled Toby down into the weeds and put her finger to her lips.

Karen was able to identify Dwight as he walked past them to the north. She almost got up when Toby grabbed her shoulder and pointed to Ryan.

Once Ryan had passed them, Toby started to get up.

"Let them go," Karen whispered. "They aren't what we're after."

--------------

Seeing that there wasn't much fighting in the southern area, the crane camera lifted to view the center of the site.

Kelly had separated from the others and was walking towards a bright pink concrete block that she thought would be excellent cover because it matched her sweatshirt.

Ryan had closed in behind Dwight. The former temp heard Kelly. She was talking to herself as she walked. "I can just wait here until somebody wins, then it's one step closer to the Bahamas."

Ryan couldn't help himself. He fired.

"Ow!" Kelly shrieked as the blue paint cartridge struck her upper torso.

Ryan ducked behind a tree. Kelly looked in the direction of the shot and saw Dwight. "You shot me in the boob you jerk!"

Ryan stifled a giggle. As soon as she left the area, he headed off to find Dwight.

--------------

Ryan interviewed after the game. "Do I feel guilty about shooting Kelly and letting Dwight take the blame? Do I feel guilty?" He paused and looked at the camera with a blank expression.

--------------

Pam heard Kelly's yelp and knew the game was probably beginning to get serious. She wished that she was back in her apartment. This was not her type of activity.

She looked around but couldn't see Phyllis. In her distraction, she stumbled down a small hill, dropping her gun and ending up face down on the ground. "Crap," she said.

She looked up she saw a sneaker. Her eyes tracked the path up the long body and saw Jim's face. He was about 10 feet from her. His gun was pointed at her. This could hurt.

Jim looked at the receptionist and lowered his weapon with a shrug.

Pam smiled at him.

He was just about to help her up when Pam saw a red paint pellet smash into his chest. Pam couldn't help squealing at the sight. Three other pellets flew past, two striking the ground and one hitting Jim's leg.

"Gotcha!" Phyllis said in what was a yell for her but was hardly above a whisper for most people.

Pam started to laugh, and probably would have continued had not she and Phyllis been hit by blue paint pellets fired by Oscar.

"Okay, you guys," an official called. "You three are out."

--------------

Kevin saw Meredith. "This is going to be great," he whispers to himself. He fired three times and hit the redhead in the leg. "Cool."

Angela, in spite of her disapproval of the activity, took the opportunity to shoot Kevin three times in the chest.

--------------

Angela interviewed after the game. "I did what was necessary." She quickly turned away, not wanting to show her slight smile.

--------------

Ryan caught up with Dwight near the enemy camp. Dwight almost fired at his teammate, but was just able to restrain himself. Together, they inched closer to the flag. They saw Stanley, and Dwight let fly eight paint balls, but each missed their target. Ryan, however was able to hit Stanley as the older man tried to find a hiding place.

--------------

At the other end of the field, Michael was trying to talk to the official. "So, you're a junior. That's cool. What are you studying?"

Toby and Karen had Michael and the flag in their sights.

Toby again grabbed Karen's shoulder. "You know Michael," he whispered. "He won't take this well."

Karen was about to protest when Toby added. "You get the flag. Let ME shoot him."

They smiled at each other as Karen nodded.

--------------

Karen interviewed after the game. "Toby is pretty cool when you get him out of the office."

--------------

Michael had his back to Toby as the HR guy approached. Seeing how intent Michael was in flirting with the coed, Toby slowly drew a bead on the manager. Seeing him, the girl shifted slightly away from Michael and casually pointed behind him. Michael turned and was shot four times in a matter of seconds.

Karen sprinted forward and grabbed the flag and the coed official blew a horn, indicating that the game was over.

Karen couldn't help laughing. Michael was covered in red paint. It looked like a he was the victim in a slasher movie."

Michael was screaming, "You can't attack someone from behind, it isn't fair."

"I shot you in the front," Toby said, unable to wipe the grin off his face.

"The shot was totally legal," the coed official agreed. "You're off the field for Round 2."

--------------

Toby interviewed after the game. "I guess Michael was right. It was a good experience."

--------------

The coworkers assembled in and everyone tried very hard to keep from laughing at Michael. The victims in the last round took off their protective clothing. Kelly was still glaring at Dwight.

Karen saw that Jim had been shot and shook her head in disappointment.

"Who got you?" She asked her boyfriend. She couldn't help sneaking a look at Pam.

Jim sighed, "Phyllis."

"Phyllis?" Karen asked, stunned.

"Yep."

"You are such a disappointment as a boyfriend," Karen joked.

"But I do make a mean grilled cheese sandwich," Jim noted.

"Well, that's all that saves you."

The official spoke, "So, Team 2 was the winner in Capture the Flag. Each member of your team will get the fifty dollar gift card to Staples. For our second game, the following players will be eligible: Toby, Karen, Angela, Oscar, Ryan, Dwight, Creed, and Drew. The winner will receive a two hundred dollar giftcard to a shop of your choice. You will be playing elimination on the small field. Toby, as the captain of the winning side, will you pick out the teams?"

"Sure," Toby said. "I think fair teams would be Me, Karen, Creed and Drew against Dwight, Ryan, Oscar, and Angela."

The official nodded and said, "The rest of you can enjoy our arcade or putt-putt facilities." Seeing the looks on the faces of some of the coworkers, he added, "We also have a brew pub just across the street.

--------------

Karen interviewed before the second game. "I'm pretty happy about being on Toby's team. But he better realize that the money is going to be mine… Maybe I'll use it to buy a paintball gun."

--------------

Michael, still complaining about Toby's ambush, went to the pub, as did Meredith and Stanley. Kevin and Phyllis played in the arcade. Jim looked out at the putt-putt course longingly.

It was kind of chilly for putt-putt, Pam thought. But looking at Jim, she sighed and grabbed two putters. "Care to try and salvage your manhood Halpert?" She asked.

Jim gave her a hurt glance. Suddenly all of the stuff with Roy came flying back to her. "I…I just meant…"

"It's okay," Jim said. The look in his eyes said it wasn't. "Sure, let's do this."

--------------

The second game was played in a backyard-sized field. There were concrete pipes, plastic blocks, and the field was surrounded by a wooden fence. Several bull-eye targets were scattered along the wall. One camera was set up at each team's home base, but there was no flag. The crane moved into place above the action.

--------------

Dwight took over as commander for his team. "Okay, we have to defend Michael's honor." The others rolled their eyes. "If Toby hadn't cowardly attacked him from behind, I know Michael would have driven them off and Ryan and I would have had time to win. I will personally give twenty dollars to the person who shoots Toby."

--------------

Dwight interviewed in full battle gear with face mask in place before the second game. "Michael will be avenged."

--------------

Karen once again led the strategy session for Toby's team. "Okay, we can see everyone over there. Once the horn goes off, we need to spread out. Let's concentrate our fire and try to pick them off one at a time."

Everyone nodded.

"Let's start with Ryan. Once we're gotten him, we'll concentrate on Oscar, then Dwight." She looked at her teammates.

"Which one is Ryan?" Creed asked.

--------------

At the start of the contest, Dwight's team moved from behind their home base. Immediately a rush of paint pellets flew towards Ryan; Karen nailed the former temp on the hip and Toby hit him on the shoulder.

Dwight took the opportunity provided by Ryan's demise to move forward. He knew that Michael had told him that Andy was his top priority, but vengeance demanded that he hit Toby. He saw the HR rep and let fly. A blue paint packet hit Toby's vest.

Toby flinched as he was hit by the high-velocity paintball. "Ouch."

Dwight couldn't help moving forward and boasting, "You my friend have just felt the awesome power of the Jackson Pollock 3000." He brandished the weapon in front of Toby.

Drew saw what Dwight had done, and something inside him snapped. He turned his paintball gun on Dwight, hitting him with pellet after pellet of red paint. "Blood!" Andy shouted.

As Dwight was hit, he fell backward and reflexively pulled the trigger on his paintball gun, sending paint packets skyward.

One of the packets, as if aimed by the hand of fate, hit the cameraman on top of the crane. Shocked, he dropped the camera, which hurtled down onto the field, narrowly missing Creed.

Drew continued firing at Dwight as the salesman laid on the ground. Everyone was staring at the Cornell grad.

Finally an official stepped forward. "Drew, stop it." She demanded.

The anger management graduate turned to her and replied. "The name is Andy."

"Whoever you are, you're out of the game."

"Whatever," Andy said. "Hey, you're cute. What are you doing later?"

The coed shook her head and yelled. "Everyone, back to your home base and we'll start over with the remaining competitors."

--------------

Dwight interviewed after the game. There are traces of red paint around his neck and some of his hair. He also has an obvious bruise on his Adam's apple. "Shunning is now an insufficient punishment. I will break Andy."

--------------

The blonde coed official interviewed after the game. "Yeah, I think I'm quitting after today. I'd like to work with a higher class of people… Maybe I'll be a stripper."

--------------

Jim and Pam had completed the first nine holes in almost complete silence. Pam could tell that Jim had something on his mind. She hoped he wouldn't share it with her. She was pretty sure what it was about.

Finally, Jim spoke. "Why?"

Pam replied. "I thought I owed it to Roy to tell him the truth."

Jim shook his head. "That's not what I'm talking about. What you told him was none of my business. What I want to know is why you didn't tell me what was going on after he trashed the bar."

"Oh."

Jim's anger was visible on his expressive face. "I mean what if he had done something to my car and Karen got hurt. Or…"

"You're right," Pam said. "I should have told you. I'm sorry. It's just that when I told Roy that I'd kissed you…"

"You didn't." Jim said looking confused.

"What?" Pam asked.

"You didn't kiss me, I kissed you," Jim said. He could tell by the look in her face that she didn't agree with him.

"I kissed you," they both said. Pam saw the realization in Jim's eyes. In her mind, she had kissed him. Wanted to kiss him. The look on her face had told him that she had feelings for him. That she still did.

"Jinx, buy me a coke," Jim whispered. He needed time to process this. He turned to the camera and said softly. "Pam can't talk until she buys me a coke. Those are the rules of jinx and they are unflinchingly rigid."

Pam nodded, thankful for the enforced silence. They walked to the concession stand, both hoping that this was a Pepsi-only place.

Phyllis was waiting by the drink machine. "Are you ready to go?" she asked Pam.

The receptionist nodded. The machine had Cokes. As she put her money in the machine Pam looked at Jim. She bought a soda and handed him the can.

"Thanks," he said.

Phyllis looked at Jim and the beverage. "So you won out there?" she asked.

"I think maybe I did," Jim admitted.

"I'm sorry I shot you," Phyllis said.

"No you aren't," Jim said with a smile.

--------------

Phyllis interviewed later. "He's right. I wasn't."

--------------

"See you Monday," Pam said softly to Jim.

Jim smiled at Pam and Phyllis. "Yeah, see you Monday."

--------------

In the meantime, there were four players left. Karen and Creed on one team, Oscar and Angela on the other.

Angela looked at Oscar and gave him one of her rare smiles. "Let's do this for the accountants," she said.

"Yeah," Oscar said. "Good luck."

"Thanks."

--------------

Angela, interviewed before the game resumed. "I'm glad to be on a team with Oscar. He's my friend." She looked away, as if in some way that statement surprised her.

--------------

Karen looked over at Creed. She obviously didn't have a lot of confidence in him. "Okay, have you even shot the paintball gun yet?"

"No," Creed admitted.

She looked at his gun and flipped the safety catch so it would fire. "Here. Shoot at the guy first, then the girl. Alright?"

"Sure," Creed answered with a smile that scared Karen just a little.

--------------

At the horn, Oscar ran to the left and Angela fired to cover him.

Karen managed to hit Oscar and red paint exploded on his arm.

Angela fired at Karen, hitting her dead center in her chest with a blue paint ball.

Creed fired once, hitting Angela between the eyes of her safety shield. The blonde accountant was momentarily stunned and fell backwards.

"I guess I win," Creed said. He casually fired off four shots. Each hit the center of a different bulls-eye on the wooden fencing.

--------------

Toby interviewed after the game. "Was this a success? Well, I think most people had a good time. As far as lessons learned, I guess it's that the best strategy is to be constantly underestimated. Not sure how that translates into selling paper."


End file.
